NYC is not Toronto

2 responses

  1. A. I live in London now, not NYC as you would know if you read carefully.

    B. The sum of your argument is for external regulation for a fee structure that investors (and therefore the market) simply don’t think is broken. That does make you sound very much like someone from our neighbor to the North who has been so kind to watch over our Northern national parks for us so that we don’t have to tax our own to maintain them, rather than someone driven by market economies.

    C. I know it is tempting to second guess markets for the “greater good,” but that is among the greatest of conceits. Alas, there is no ready cure for that sort of thing save poverty.

    D. What the hell good is a “no-fault” divorce clause when the underlying asset is untraded and illiquid securities for a bunch of dying start up companies? None at all, of course.

  2. Mark McQueen says:

    Welcome back, Mr./Ms. No G5 Yet.

    A. My sincere apologies, I got mesmerized by the “Offering memorandum” section of your blog, which misled me to believe that “‘Equity Private’ was recently named ‘Vice President’ of a middle market leveraged buyout firm in Manhattan”. And then there was the second source, your Q&A section:

    “Q. Can you give me a hint where you and the Debt Bitch work? A. Well, it’s a private equity firm. Q. Can’t you give me a bigger hint than that? A. We do buyouts. Q. Maybe narrow it down a little more? A. In New York.”

    Then there’s the opening line: “Contact: equityprivate@hushmail.com, Location: New York, NY; United States”

    According to DNS, your IP address is registered to RoadRunner in Virginia, which was another sign that your claims to being a VP in NYC were, in fact, valid. But why is it bouncing off a Houston account? Did you attend UT? Go Longhorns!

    If I was supposed to read the 79 posts from March 2006 alone to find out that your deal execution skills had earned you a transfer to The City, well, then congrats and apologies for my lack of curiosity. While you’re there, try Strickland & Sons on Saville Row. About 8,000-12,000 pounds for a suit, and you have to wait 18 months at least for them to make it. Hopefully you won’t get transferred back to Knick-land before its finished. Or worse.

    B. The sum of my argument is that pension funds need to apply the same payout methodologies to hedge funds as they do to the other funds they invest in: infrastructure GPs, merchant bank GPs, venture capital GPs, mezz GPs and venture debt GPs. As for the Northern national parks, we’ve enjoyed them since well before the War of 1812. And we feel a bit selfish that 100% of our population have health care while 30 million of our neighbours to the south do not. And there’s a bit of guilt that we build most of those Honda’s that American’s have been buying for the last decade, at the expense of your “Big 3”; now top 3 out of 4? But we’d take Alaska back; got hosed on that deal and would rather you not drill for oil there.

    C. See B., first half, above.

    D. This clause covers the waterfront of funds: merchant banks, infrastructure funds, etc., although maybe not your LBO fund (using a hedge sturcture perhaps?). Funds that have “no-fault divorce” clauses have received funding from many of the world’s largest LPs. This clause ends the commitment period, and prevents the LPs from losing another dime if that was their fear (hedge funds draw 100% of the capital much faster).

    MRM

    P.S. Because we are such good sports, and enjoy your blog, we’ve put it up as a “fav” despite the pounding you’ve been doling out.

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