Bring on "The Big Decision"

Did you hear the news? The CBC is going to put their Dragons to work in some new pseudo-reality TV show called “The Big Decision“. According to the CBC release:

“The stars of Canada’s top-rated entertainment program Dragons’ Den are hitting the road to help struggling companies get back on track by offering their expertise – and their own MONEY.

Producers of the exciting new series The Big Decision are currently searching for Canadian companies to participate in the show, which will give business owners an opportunity to receive no-nonsense advice and an investment from Canada’s most successful and respected entrepreneurs.

In recent years, companies across the country have been dealing with big challenges: a high dollar, a weak economy and a severe credit crunch. The Big Decision is a new series here to help.

Each 1-hour episode will feature two separate businesses facing tough times. A Dragon will visit each company, roll up their sleeves, and put their expertise to work. If the Dragons think they can help turn things around, they’ll be willing to invest their OWN money – and change the fortunes of good companies that have fallen on hard times.

The Big Decision is a once-in a lifetime opportunity for hard-working business owners to get the boost that their company needs to survive – AND thrive.

What kind of companies can apply?
– Must have been in operation for at least three to five years or more
– Gross revenue of at least $500,000 per year (average)
– More than five employees
– Privately held business, family business, partnerships, limited partnerships
– Must be willing to commit to being filmed on camera for up to a two-week period
– Businesses registered in Canada
– Fluent English speakers

What are the benefits of applying?

Get FREE top-notch business consultation: marketing, sales, inventory, financing, staffing, etc. All experts will visit the businesses personally – no travel necessary. It’s a chance to get an investment or loan to help the business when other sources have been exhausted.”

This got me thinking. Our firm meets all of the criteria to be on the show (except for the part about being in dire straights, that is). And we have a big challenge: the army of lenders at the Business Development Bank of Canada continue to compete with the private sector, despite the fact that the BDC’s own governing legislation requires it to “complement” and “round out” the services provided by the private sector. Since the BDC sets annual loan growth targets of 6-8%, and pays bonuses to their lenders to bring the loans in, the Government of Canada winds up competing with firms such as ours. It happened twice this week alone, in fact.

Can you imagine the scene where Kevin O’Leary comes into our office and sizes up the situation. That alone will be good TV.

As we’ve all read, KO is “Right of Attilla the Hun”. You can just visualize his head exploding when he finds out that i) a government Crown Corp. uses its ultra low cost of capital and comfort with doing imprudent loan structures to win business away from the private sector, and ii) many Canadian businesses are essentially subsidized by taxpayers with government loans at 3% (the going prime rate)? He will lose his mind. This not what conservative-minded people think should be happening in a modern economy; KO will be on the horn to Ottawa in a nano-second.

It’ll make his interview with Chris Hedges look civil by comparison.

After four years of trying, and failing, to stop these rabid government lenders (see representative prior post “‘Bruce’ the mindless eating machine” May 31-08), perhaps the time has come to break the glass and play into the CBC’s never-ending thirst for splenetic content.

KO might even enjoy the chance to succeed where others (read: me) have failed.

MRM
(disclosure: this post, like all blogs, is an Opinion piece)